Alternative Plant Names: Toxic-O-Ding-Dong

Toxic-O-Ding-Dong
Originally uploaded by inyopfc

Some may know it as Toxicodendron diversilobum, while others know it as Poison Oak. Yet more people know it as @#@#%$!^^^#$.

To a fake scientist, it is Toxic-O-Ding-Dong.

And it makes a really bad toilet paper.

Tracking Radio-collared Hipsters

In 2001 the National Park Service started a project to fit 12 Hipsters with radio collars and track their movements. In the picture above, biologist Emmanuel tracks a hipster utilizing the 101 freeway as a connecting corridor between Silverlake and San Francisco. This corridor along Highway 101 is vital to hipster dispersal because the area between Silverlake and San Francisco is otherwise filled with habitats unsuitable for Hipsters, except for one coffee shop in San Luis Obispo.

In the last 5 years, a disturbing trend has been noted in Hipsters, with their population dropping by at least 80%. It is believed that some of them have entered torpor due to too much cocaine, while others have pupated and transformed into Yuppies or so-called "Indie-Kids". Projects like the one pictured above are vital in ensuring the survival of this strange, rare species.

1.5 Miles from Economic Collapse

1.5 Miles from Economic Collapse
Originally uploaded by inyopfc

Apparently the next Great Depression is only 1.5 miles past this sign. Also, apparently someone thought that shooting the sign would cause economic stimulus.

Ladybug Orgy

Ladybug Orgy
Originally uploaded by inyopfc

Where are the Republicans? This is a moral outrage!

Science Disproves Commonly Stated Belief about Texas

Thick arundo
Originally uploaded by inyopfc

"Everything is Bigger in Texas"... so the phrase goes. But is it true?


It is certainly hotter in South Texas, and flatter. The thunderstorms are bigger. However, the invasive Arundo growing in Texas is actually smaller, and less dense, than in California.

So, we recommend the motto is refined thusly: "Everything is Bigger in Texas Except Some Noxious Weeds which are Bigger in California"

Hemlock Woolly Adelgid interview

Wow. Now i've seen it all. While searching some hilarious YouTube videos I came across this video of an interview with a Hemlock Woolly Adelgid. While I feel this information is important to get across to the public I just wish they had .... I don't know... maybe REHEARSED?! Still it's funny:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I3KD9vUhuaw

Alternative Plant Names: Trail Penis

Yucca
Originally uploaded by inyopfc

Throughout history, botanists have given plants vaguely inappropriate names. Some examples include the common name "blue dicks" and the scientific names "Lupinus succulentus" and "Trifolium fucatum". That's as far as it ever went, though.

Well, a real fake scientist doesn't just go half way. The plant pictured here goes by the names of "chaparral yucca" or the vaguely religious name "Our Lord's Candle". (Scientific name: Yucca whipleii). Well, we have abandoned these non-secular common names and have renamed this beautiful plant Trail Penis. Anyone who has hiked in California's chaparral in spring will know why.

Note, however, that this trail penis tends to bend to the left a bit.

For those of you who don't appreciate plants named after genitalia, please use the slightly modified alternative name, "Our Lord's Q-tip"